I'm gonna be on Lost !

Oh Honey...

Who's your Daddy ? I don't knoooooooooow...

Sorry. She lost her underpanties.

A big gay angel !

She’s had the romantic. She’s had the intellectual. How about all of that in one fine, little brown package ?

Given how much time you spend engaging in pointless self-abuse, you might consider just this once using your genitalia to actually accomplish something.

You seem to have forgotten the reason we live together is that we're best friends. And I've got your back, Jack.

An entire dinner to talk about your research? Where you goin, the drive thru at Jack In The Box

If you have to ask if it’s homophobic to ask questions, haven’t you already answered your own question?

I’m a sophisticated American. I’ve been pretending to like soccer since 2004.

I want to be a book. She can pick me up, flip through my pages, and make sure nobody drew wieners in me.

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