Dear Reader, now it's time for you to decide. What does Tony say next?
"...because they contain the components for a top secret time travel device. We can't let that fall into the wrong hands!"
"...because they contain my stash of hamster porn. God, I hope no one manages to get one open. I can already feel the shame!"
"...because all my good underwear is in there. I told you, didn't I? Or would you prefer that I trip over my naughty bits? Would you honestly prefer to see that happen?"
"...because I'm taking a consignment of Bibles to the kitten orphanage here in the Greater Cachalot Mall. Those kittens need to know that they're going to Hell unless they receive Jesus Christ as their Lord and Cat Master."
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