I am a sucess story...from OkCupid. I started my online dating about a year ago on singlesnet, it was ok, I went on a few dates, although no "love connection" the other problem there is you cannot narrow down wants/needs enough to get good hits. Match.com and Chemistry.com...both sucked entirely...my big thing is I am a smoker. although considerate I smoke I also have children...I regularly got possible matches from both of these sites that did not like either of these things...waste of time. PletyofFish gets a lot of undesirables at least as far as appearance, and not that I was looking for a "hunk" but at least shower and shave once in a while. I got on OkCupid in October...absolutely love everything about there site....answer questions..take tests...look at profiles, chat, email...all for free. The best part I found my soulmate and am so happy! We both answered over 300 questions on this site...you can compare your answers with possible matches, my soulmate and I answered all but 8 exactly the same.
What I learned from on line dating is that you have to have an open mind, not every guy/gal is going to be perfect and if you make some new friends along the way...awesome, I was always open and honest about this being my attitude, knowing that I would know when the "one" came along. There are a lot of scammers...be very wary familiarize yourself with the scammer sites Internet Love Scams. org and Romance Scams.com... good luck with an open mind and an open heart you can find love...even on line.
On match.com, I like that I can advertise for a broad range of very PC attributes, but then secretly search for my best choices without being judged as too narrow minded. However, I encountered 7 guys in 3 weeks who were TOTALLY not who they said. Similar stories from most: no parents or sibs, widowed or cheated wife,usually single dad with child under 10, live local but working in West Africa at the moment. Then the request for money for lost luggage, credit card mishap, hospital visit to be covered later by insurance, etc. Be careful on Match.com. They usually engage by IM, then chat. have them email and then check the IP address!
I have tried 3 out of 5 of them and have had zero luck also.. Match.com was the worse! I paid them on 3 different occasions and I got maybe 3 bad date out of it.. The guys on there seem so pretentious.. It was so frustrating.. I am also on plenty of fish and yahoo personals and I have not had luck their either.. In fact I called a guy last week who in less than 2 minutes told me he had been in jail for the last 9 years for armed robbery.. Little scary. I am turn 30 in 10 days and I honestly have no clue where to look anymore..
As a guy, I have tried them all and not impressed with any of them. The problem with online dating is all the married guys, playes and nuts. These guys have made it impossible for the nice single guy to even have a chance at it. I have finally given up on online dating as women rarely respond to requests to communicate. Granted Im not god's gift, but not terribly unattractive, just average. Ladies get hundreds of requests daily and its difficult to sift through it all, but in the process real catches get passed over.
What ends up happening is alot of window shopping for "the best deal". For guys, my experience has been, you have to write to 20-30 ladies before you get any kind of response, things go well for a little bit, then all quiet!! is it hard to get?, did u get interested in someone else? or was it something I said?
When this happens, I move on, as I don't know you well, and how much effort should I put in, if your not going to continue the communication. Im certainly not going chase after someone like a long lost puppy and badger you to death.
Irritations that I experienced were every profile begins to sound the same, shopping lists, trick photos, no photos, honest descriptions of body, age. Every profile states they want a guy who is honest, yet that liberty is not granted to us guys. I can't tell you how many dates I went on with body type average or a few extra pounds only to find out they weighed more than I. If I were to put a shopping list of what I wanted, there would be no date-ie double standard. My experience has been that ladies are far more picky about looks even though they say that sense of humor is more important than looks. It takes looks to get to that point. We live in a visual society. I found it funny the article about "a field guide to guys" ladies need a field guide to understand men, and us men need IBM's Big Blue's database to understand women!! Ladies us guys are very simple!! All you need to do is make us feel appreciated, loved and just be a nice person. Do not expect us to think like you, be mind readers, if you want us to do something just ask and don't expect us to read between the lines or interpret subtle hints, we are not geared that way. The statement that you can attract more bee's with honey is true!! If you nag, bitch, whine, complain, fight, argue, never happy, everything is tha mans fault, etc, etc, etc, Let me tell you, I can go to work and get this and do not look forward to coming home to it as well. At home I am suppose to have my biggest supporter!! Not someone who is never satisfied with who I am.