Would you turn Janet's first page? Be tough. Comments help the writer.

1 Comment

  • Irene - 13 years ago

    Even after your edit, I wasn't sure I wanted to read on. It felt a bit like looking through a relative's photo album at a family reunion: all those strange faces, and so boring! I have to admit the sheer amount of names and potential characters put me off from the start. I didn't have time to empathize with any of them, and I had no idea whether there was a problem of any kind or not. The kidnapping hook was too little too late for me, I'm afraid.

Leave a Comment

0/4000 chars

Submit Comment