What's your biggest personal fear?

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  • Terri - 13 years ago

    At the age of 44, I found myself alone after almost 10 years of being with my significant other. I always say 'Everything Happens For a Reason'....well, it does! Out of those ten (10) years, he spent two (2) years in prison. The morning he turned himself, I was by his side until the judge summoned for him. The remainder of that dreadful day, was the worst day of my life. For days I didn't eat, sleep or had the energy to go to the office. Luckily, my immediate boss knew of the circumstances and told me to stay home until I was better...I stayed home for three (3) days and had the weekend to think about my life. I didn't know how to be alone, but I adjusted to this new way of life. After his release in 2005, we moved into our new condo. At first we were happily connected again, but then our life started falling apart. We didn't know how to be alone and there were several times when we would go our own way, but we always worked out our differences, until one day in January 2008. The next three (3) months were hell and I knew in my heart this time was the final straw. In April 2008, I was alone again...no sleep, no appetite, luckily I was changing careers and I had two weeks to pick myself up again. I filed for divorce and on July 2nd, 2008, it was final. We learned to be friends again, and that was a big mistake. Sleeping together was taboo! So then being 'alone' again became easier and it was and I found myself enjoying MY life. I did what I wanted to do, whenever I wanted to...Sunday evening's became my day to relax, which meant climbing into my comfortable bed by 7PM and watch TV all night long 'alone'. Peace and quiet is what I cherished most in my life now. At times I would come home by 4PM and have dinner by 6PM, shut everything off downstairs and make the climb to my bedroom, my haven! It takes time, just like death. You never really get over it, but it becomes a big easier as time goes by. So enjoy your 'alone' time!

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